pokemon blue

Everyone on tumblr is all like, “I love books!” “Look at this picture of a bookstore!” “Here is a weirdly-shaped room full of books!

And I’m like “Bitch I read Gravity’s Rainbow and now I’m reading War and Peace, top that.”

Also people who spell “too” as “to” shouldn’t be allowed to say things like “I’m [too] picky about fanfiction!”

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wildly intimidated

I’m watching “The Daily Show,” right, and the interviewee is Shailene Woodley, who I don’t think especially highly of, and she’s really striking me as a poor man’s Jennifer Lawrence. Which is made even funnier by the fact that they’re talking about how Woodley is starring in some movie or other that’s supposedly the next Hunger Games.

perfect blue

For fuck’s sake.

After I got home from class today, I spent like four hours being basically a housewife (making [my] dinner, folding the laundry that was in the dryer [not mine, by the way, it was towels and sheets and about an outfit each of Mom’s and Dad’s], doing my own laundry plus the shit that was in there from beforehand [Dad’s clothes from the poker game last night], cleaning the kitchen [both before and after the dinner-making], taking out the garbage, taking out the recycling, paying the dog walker [I swear to god, next time I find money lying around the house, I’m just gonna take it], delivering the wrongly-delivered mail to the appropriate downstairs apartment)…

This evening, Dad gets home from work and there’s the usual dithering around the house, he’s talking to Mom and lounging around while I’m in the kitchen waiting for my cookie to cool and also for it to be time to walk the dog, and then we walk the dog, and then I go eat my cookie (yum), and we’re all settled in for the evening…

Alice is chillin’ in the hall looking her usual baffled self, so I guide her into the parents’ room to settle, which she does, because I am awesome, and Dad asks me if I put his shirt (from poker) in the dryer. Now, the answer is “yes,” and I remember this distinctly because when I took it out of the washing machine where it had been thrown, so it’s only logical that I would’ve washed it when I did my laundry, I checked the washing instructions on the tag, and it clearly said machine wash, tumble dry low, which is what basically all washing machine- and dryer-safe clothing says, so I put it in the dryer to dry.

Now, what I said was “I don’t remember.” In fact, what I said was “I know there was definitely a piece of clothing that was dried on a hanger, but I can’t remember if it was yours or one of mine.” That is a lie. My clothing was all gym fare and pajamas, none of which have special washing or drying instructions. None of the clothes were dried on hangers because none of them needed to be.

Okay, okay. I may be able to let that one slide. I got away with the lie, after all, and I know the shirt is dryer-safe, so no harm, no foul.

What did not happen, however, was anyone (Mom included) saying anything to me that sounded even remotely like, oh, I don’t know, “Thanks for doing the laundry.”

You’re welcome, guys. You are welcome.

Fuck it.

Also I just blacklisted some dude on tumblr for posting some shit about Perfect Blue having a lazy ending and episode 5 of Paranoia Agent making no sense. Yo, I ain’t got time for this anti-Satoshi Kon bullshit, you fucktard.

we the people

I don’t want to reblog this on my tumblr for…reasons? (Mine is basically a fandom blog, I don’t want this poor-quality photography shit up in there.) But I want it for reference in my life.

Life cheats!


(Ohhhh, it’s groceries in laundry baskets. That’s clever.)

Tip for all my student readers: if you’re too lazy to use a bibliography creator like NoodleBib or RefWorks, let Google generate your bibliography entries for you. All you have to do is google the article/book title in Google Scholar, click “cite” at the bottom of the search result, and copy either the MLA, APA, or Chicago cite into your word document.

• Accidentally close a tab? Ctrl+Shift+T reopens it.
• Bananas release dopamine, eat them when you’re sad.
• CTRL+SHIFT+ESC is the one handed version of CTRL+ALT+DEL
• Don’t brush your teeth hard, it makes them sensitive and removes enamel.
• Don’t like spiders? Put citronella oil on your walls and they will not go there.
• Drink one glass of water for every alcoholic drink you have, you’ll get drunk without getting a hangover.
• Get clear ice cubes by boiling water before freezing it
• Heal paper cuts and immediately stop the pain with chapstick.
• If you accidentally write on your dry erase board with a permanent marker, scribble over it with a dry eraser marker to remove it.
• If your shoes smell, put them in the freezer overnight, it will kill the bacteria.
• Make bug bites stop itching with a banana peel.
• Make a paper longer with 12-point text, but 14-point periods and commas.
• Need to get around a blocked website at work? Try replacing the http:// with https://
• Never send your resume as a word file (unless asked) Instead, print it to a pdf file, it’s much cleaner and professional looking.
• Pick a flavor of gum you don’t normally chew, and chew it while studying during a test.
• Place a piece of bread in a container with your homemade cookies and  they will stay soft.
• Put a dry towel into a dryer with wet clothes, they will dry faster.
• Put toothpaste on a pimple and it will dry out.
• Practise fake smiling in the mirror every day before going to work/school, you’ll genuinely start to feel happier.
• Rub canola/olive oil on knives before cutting onions, you won’t cry, alternatively chew gum and you won’t either.
• Short on time with a wrinkled dress shirt? Hang it up in the bathroom to steam it flat.
• The night before, place things you don’t want to forget the next morning on top of your shoes.
• Use hydrogen peroxide to remove blood stains from clothing.
• When cleaning windows use newspapers or coffee filters instead of paper towels, they will not leave streaks.
• When microwaving bread products/pizza put a glass of water in with it, it will keep your bread for going spongy.
• When you move into a new place you’re renting, take pictures of any and all damage, then post them on facebook (privately if preferred) so you can use the reference date as proof you didn’t do it.
• When searching plane tickets online delete your cookies prior, prices go up when you visit a site multiple times. <sma

athelney

I hate it when people get up in arms about things they’re passionate about.

That sounds weird. I don’t mean that I hate it when people fight for causes near and dear to them.

Let me explain.

I’ve been looking up a lot of recipes (like I do) (it’s summer and it’s fucking hot and most of my recipes require an oven, but I don’t wanna) and some of them have been raw, and so I’m thinking about raw foodists (that’s a thing, look it up), and I’m also thinking about just plain old vegetarians (and vegans, a little). And I’m thinking about how goddamn defensive some of them can get.

I am a vegetarian. I am a specific type of vegetarian called a pescatarian, which means I eat fish but no other animals. Many people would say that disqualifies me from being a vegetarian since a fish is an animal, and to them I say fuck you. Vegetarianism is not like being black or being gay. Or being black and gay. You’re not part of a group that’s faced a history of discrimination and hardship, been denied basic human rights and decency based on something inherent and unchanging about you, been tortured and killed for nothing but being who you are. You aren’t an abused cow. You eat vegetables. That’s super. We’re all proud of you. If only we could all be more like you.

But don’t get all up in my grill for identifying as one of you. I like fish. It’s healthy. I also like vegetables and I don’t eat turkey or beef or pig or whatever’s in a hot dog. I know fish can be treated poorly too, and I know their farming is not always done well, but, no, shut up a second, I’m not being a hypocrite because humaneness is not my reason for not eating meat. Health is. “Humans don’t need to eat other animals to survive,” well, no shit, but we also don’t need to eat chocolate or caramel or drive to work or watch TV and we do it anyway. Because we like it. (Maybe not driving to work. Shut up.)

Kind of like gay marriage, does it hurt you in any way that I call myself vegetarian? And vegans, does it hurt you if someone calls himself a vegan but still eats honey? Answer: no. No it doesn’t. It has nothing to do with you. Chances are you wouldn’t even know if someone hadn’t brought it up. Sooo sit down and shut up, and remember: No one cares what you think. About this issue. This issue specifically.

daidouji tomoyo

1. I like “Pretty Little Liars.” The TV show, not the books. I’ve never read the books. But I like the show; I watch it regularly and I enjoy new episodes coming out. I’m even considering going back to S1 and watching all the ones that aired before I got into it.

2. I like Aria and Ezra as a couple. I do. I have a little bit of an age fetish; not a huge gap, but like…seven or eight years. I think it’s very sweet. Not in real life; in real life, I’m too suspicious. But in fiction, it can be one of my favorite things in romance, if it’s tasteful.

I just wanted to get that out there. Emily is really uncomfortable with the pairing, or at least she was glad when they broke up because it was super weird and inappropriate, but I actually want them to get back together.

Yep.